I have been listening to organisations demanding that we defend our human right to die with dignity.
I find myself unable to support them.
It has nothing to do with the horrible realities of terminal illnesses or whether people should indeed be permitted to assist with voluntary euthanasia.
It is completely about my petty objection to their clumsy euphemism. No-one has “a right to die with dignity.” There’s no Court of Appeal that will reanimate you if die on the toilet. You can’t wear clown-shoes and a red nose into an operating theatre, and warn your surgeon “You’d better not infringe on my rights!” Some of my preferred ways of dying are completely undignified.
Change the wording, dear lobbyists, and I will be right behind you. Meanwhile, you can take my right to die without any dignity at all, when you can pry it from my cold, mid-nose-pick fingers.