OddThinking

I predict:

• The 2012 Apocalypticism will (continue to) increasingly grab the imaginations of the populace throughout 2012.
• That more and more embellishments will (continue to) be added to the history of the Mesoamerican Long Count Calendar, to the continued disgust of Mayan scholars and others who get upset by the cooption of ancient cultures into New Age beliefs.
• That more and more would-be debunkers will patiently explain why those interpretations are wrong based on their own spurious misunderstandings of an ancient culture, to the continued disgust of Mayan scholars, etc.
• That more and more alternatives will (continue to) be added to the list of possible causes of apocalypse, to the continued disgust of astronomers, geologists, nuclear physicists and defenders of open government.
• That confusion about the predicted date of the apocalypse will (continue to) grow.
• That you will meet at least one geek who has taught himself^* how to read the calendar. (^* I am not saying there won’t be female geeks that also learn it, but that you will meet at least one male one.)
• That from June to November no stand-up routine will be entirely free of references.
• That from November to December, no popular twitter account will be entirely free of references.
• That people, in general, will continue to joke about and culturally reference the apocalypse, until almost everyone is tired of it, and even then the references will still continue. (Hint: I reached that point over a year ago, which makes me have mixed feelings about posting this list.)
• You will personally hear at least three alpaca/apocalypse puns.
• That few adults will actively profess to believing in any of the predictions, and yet strangely believers will have a disproportionate influence as anonymous posters on online forums.
• Despite denying all belief, many people – probably most people – will laughingly use it as an ironic excuse to slacken off in some way. “There’s no point mowing the lawn; it’ll all be destroyed.”
• Despite the fact that this is said in jest, the lawn still won’t get mown. (c.f. “Everyone is going to die of something, so there’s no point giving up cigarettes.”)
• People organising Christmas events after December 20 will be particularly irked by people using it as an excuse not to RSVP promptly.
• Despite that few adults believe, young children will hear about it and get scared. There will be nightmares, and lots of reassurance required.
• Despite that few adults believe, there will be some mentally-disturbed people who do believe. There will be suicides.
• It will be used as an excuse for drinking. There will be End-Of-The-World parties, but on different days. People organising Christmas events on December 20 and 21 will be irked by people who go to End-Of-The-World parties instead.
• That the world will not end.
• That people will tweet to Australians asking if the world has ended there yet.
• That some natural catastrophe will coincidentally occur, and many people will latch onto it, and permanently associate it with the End Of The World predictions.
• In the week afterwards, many people will continue to scoff at the weird beliefs that some people have. Exactly 0.0% of them will use the opportunity to self-reflect about their own superstitions and mistaken beliefs, and what could be done to overcome them.
• It will all happen again in a few years.

Happy New Year.